The muddle of my obsessing thoughts (a) A blurry self portrait

(If at all this post leaves you puzzled,honestly that’s what I want)

Anonymity
Blue roses

Books

Carefree attitude with a limit.

Challenges worse than the darkest death.

Cool breeze

Craze

Dark woods

Death

Disguise

Dreams

Excellence

Fashion- A part of confidence.

Fears

Friendship with no best friends

God

Hopes

Independence

Liberty

Loneliness

Love

Memories of gran

Music

My sis.

My Invisible friend

My perfect brother.

My diary,

My room

  My blog

  My pen

My Independent sensible thoughts

Night sky.

Nostalgia

Own identity.

Passion

Poems

Prayers

Possessiveness

Pain of parents’ love

Rain drops

Regrets

Success

Supernaturalism

Silence

Shadows

Silent tears

Should- Speak my mind,Protest for fair matters,Teach my aunt devil the meaning of selflessness and the world that there is only one god…

AND

At last, leave this world after making my mark and as a good human being….

dear brother,

My dear brother,

Until that day, when I was a lonely wayfarer in the never ending desert, crying in my heart, looking at the scorching sun, I never saw you..

Then you became a haven better than heaven, a reason to smile.

Then you made the blue roses of hopes bloom, with your brotherly love.

Let me shout this dear brother that you are the bestest in this wayward world,and this bond will never die.

I wish I were a song, so that I can go around the world to tell them how much I love you..

If there is only one life, I am contented.

But if there are many, I want only you as my brother….<3

The talking shoes!:)

First of all, I wish I knew what actually ran through your mind when you first read the title of this postJ

Okay, so the other day I was arranging my books and I was totally surprised to see this small book called “The talking shoes” by enid blyton!

It was then I recalled that it was the prize I won when I was in kindergartenJ

I think it was for a singing competition…

I had actually forgotten about this book and was excited to see it after a long time. And you know what? I read the book immediately.

A small story about a pair of talking shoes transforming a naughty little girl.

Of course very kiddish but yet It was beautiful!

It made me remember all the  pranks I did when I was young, how naughty I had been , how all we cousins enjoyed our summer hols together,the silly fights we got into!

Now everything has changed so much… a busy world, where one forgets himself…

True, that sometimes the flying time fail to take the sheen off the memories we cherish….its really a mystery how some olden golden memories stay so fresh as if it had happened only yesterday!

Well, see how a small book became a reason to think about all this and a topic to blogJ

Thank you Enid Blyton!

So Before I conclude, guess what this “The talking shoes” leave behind when it went back to the shelf, all the more pretty???

Nothing but a true beatific smile on my face…. :)

know not why...

“In front of your eyes,

have I grown

from a tot to a teen…

Know not why

now your love is shielded,

with your hollow fear and agony…

Love me if you trust me

 trust me if you love me”

LOVE YOU MEN IN BLUE!

TEAM SPIRIT=INDIA

AND  finally after the long wait of 28 years, WE HAVE LIFTED THE WORLD CUP, WE HAVE BECOME THE CHAMPIONS OF THE WORLD…!!!!!

After the Kapil’s devils, Dhoni’s boys have done it again.

No better sent-off to the legendary master blaster from the world cup.

India did not sleep yesterday. omg! How could we?

India really deserved it!such was the batting,bowling,and fielding performances of India throughout the tournament. Tough luck for lanka.
No wrong in saying that sreesanth is a lucky charm for india and what a bowling by zaheer khan!highly commentable although in the last over he was a bit expensive.

When crowd was shocked when sehwag was trapped LBW by Malinga off the very second ball of the innings,and thought that they were dreaming when sachin was gone for just 18 runs ,nobody had the faintest idea that a few hours later, they would be rejoicing and April 2 was gonna be the unforgettable day for any Indian.

After the two big losses, young blood Gambhir and kohili, rebuilt the innings as well as rekindled the hopes of the one billion beating hearts of India.

When kohili was gone for 35, came dhoni, the captain cool.

 He had struggled through the tournament and was evidently not in form, and hence automatically nobody expected him to do wonders and doubted dhoni’s move of promoting himself up the batting order to number 4.

But I really knew that he was gonna rock because he had always been my favourite cricketer ever since he entered our Indian team and he has this ability of peaking up at the right time.
From which other captain can you expect this?Clearly he is the captain cool.

When Gambhir was gone for 97,India still had wickets in hand.

And then came Yuvi,with determination and confidence in his eyes.

During the last few overs, when the number of balls and the required runs were the same, occasional fours and sixes by dhoni and yuvi eased the pressure off them, setting it back on the Lankan bowlers.

Finally in the 48.2^nd  over, came the winning shot with dhoni hitting a SIX!

And along with the six, came all sorts of screams, cheers, applause, smiles-the moments of ecstasy, the moments of celebration!what a pride it was to watch the Indian flags fly high!!!!!

And it was indeed a great sight to see the Indian players lifting the one and only sachin tendulkar-the god of cricket, on their shoulders, and leading him around the ground.(sachin, you are born to play this game, you are just incredible! mwaaaah!)

Nobody could resist the tears of joy and it was great to watch the respect everyone had for our master blaster. No wonder India lifted the world cup for sachin!

This cup is the answer to all the criticisms that team India has faced right from the beginning of the tournament and to all who doubted India’s ability and performance.

not to forget India’s coach Gary Kirsten.He did an incredible job and Was somebody more than a coach to team India.with this world cup he too is bidding farewell.

Of course, this world cup after the long 28 years is like the rain after a long drought and we are the delighted dwellersJ

INDIA ROCKS!!!! JAI HO INDIA!

Dear time...

 Dear  time,

RUN fast!As fast as you can...

True, that we curse you for flying and turning everything to mere memories and the same we, praise you by calling you “a magic healer”. My dear friend, I apologize you for that . We have always been crazy people, selfish people and we always behave like a cat on the wall,

People complain that you kill their beautiful childhood days.

Now I feel, what is the point in staying forever in one’s childhood? Isn’t it non-sense to always remain dependent and ignorant?

So, my dear friend, please do run fast! It’s my request

Because independence is all I need now.

I have grown impatient because it is exasperating to stay on an island for so long that too captivated. I feel its simply ridiculous to just sit and stare. . I am restless. Won’t you consider this prayer of a confused teenager?

Before the anger defeats you...

“AARGH! WHO ENTERED MY ROOM and touched my personal stuffs???????”-you scream

“And my beatles’s  CD is missing!omg!!!!!”, but no one seems to answer.

“And my ipod!!!!!!!!!!! Jeeez!”

This time you run out of your room and enter the room of your prime suspect. Yes your sis!

You scream! But your sis shows an “I don’t live in this world itself”” expression on her face.

Now you can’t bear it anymore .without another word you take a leap towards your sis. Of course, your sis won’t keep quiet, And NOW, Ladies and gentleman the quarrel begins: D

Well friends, this is an example of a  common fight.

We all become angry for reasons that are silly to serious. And unfortunately unlike expressing other emotions, we can’t express anger because is harmful to others and even to us.

Well I am here to give you certain ways by which you can control your anger(as if I am so patient! but believe me this will really help you to at least reduce the impacts of anger on you as well as on the person you are angry with)

First, let us rewind the above situation. You enter your room and understand that somebody has sneaked in, and the missing Beatles CD and the broken Ipod are the proofs.

And you have reasons to believe that all that are the works of your sis

NOW,

.1-before you feel like hitting your sis reach for a paper and pen

Now convert your anger into words. Scribble out whatever comes to your mind. (Well, this seems stupid because you will go blind when you are angry. Now that you have read this, always be prepared with a paper and penJ)

Now if your anger is gone,keep it up! Well if not, try this.

2-IMAGINE yourself kicking or hitting or pinching your sis .If you cant imagine just grab a pillow and start hitting it (well sorry,I am not responsible for the later scoldings from your mom)

Now is the anger gone? yes? Wonderful! No? Don’t worry

3-Count from 1 to 10 slowly (an old method) plus think like this”I am different from others and I wont allow the enemy -anger to defeat me”

Now your anger will definitely vanish and still if you are angry I am sorry ,uh-oh your poor sis!:(

So that’s it.

[Now coming to your missing beatles C.D and Ipod matter. well once your anger is gone, wait for a chance to sneak into your sister’s room and search for your things and if you are unable to find them, take some of your sister’s fave belongings and get out. once your sis finds out that ,she will come to you.

NOW offer the two way dealJ]

 So friends try the above methods and defeat the dangerous enemy-anger before it defeats you.Go on take up this challenge.Good luck!

lost...

ever felt like you are lost in the woods?just you and your fear and the deep dark woods?
cursing yourself for going into this intimidating place when it beckoned you??regretting for what you have done???,struggling hard to get out?? wishing for at least a star to show the way??but never succeeding? 

My prayers for japan...

heart breaking..........

So miserable that another earthquake and tsunami have hit the coast of japan today.

Nature is showing her rage once again ,another warning for the  man to put an end to his greed.

Feeling really sorry for the people’s fate.

wishing with all my heart, for the re-establishment of normalcy in japan soon and my prayers for the country.

i wish....

I wish I could fly….

Fly until the zenith of the night sky and then look down at the sleeping world and scream at the top of my voice “you don’t know me!”

And float like that ,smiling as the maze down there entangles my mind, but never trying to find out where I really belonged to…

And then, like how roses of  glass shatters when dropped from the heaven, I wish I could vanish suddenly to everywhere, erasing every memory of mine from the mind of every one I know,from the mind of everyone who knows me, to make it all like I never existed at all…

Loss is loss...

Loss is loss…be it small or big,a thing or a person …anything

Well something that I realized recently

And everyone knows that time heals this wound.

But do you believe this healing is eternal??NO

what I observed about time was that, it has a mechanism to do this whole healing process.. …

I believe it’s the plan of the time that we,at somepoint of our life, feel  that we have found a substitute for our loss…(and we may even get what we lost itself as in the case of a relationship, but with a lot of weak patchworks…)

And at that time your hearts swears to you that it is the same old one that you lost once. And it will all feel fresh, a new beginning… that’s how the pain vanishes

Then life moves on….

Is that the end??? No its not over folks…

one day you will seriously ponder why is it that the vacuum is still there even when it is filled?? Why is it that nothing is like how it was before??? why am I acting ????

Then you will realize that the substitute was deceptive, was imperfect and your smile fades.

And here a severe ache rushes out and then you will know time was a cheat because the grief of loss is still there, it was there all these days, at some corner of your heat like an unrotten corpse in the cold.

And even time wont come to your rescue at that time, for it’s role is over.

Then you will stop acting, you wont value your substitute anymore, you will stop showing your fake smile,you will accept the truth.

And if you ask me if there is any way to kill the pain, I would say-No, Because loss is loss.

But friends you know what? tomorrow when you become a loss to somebody else, you can pass on a copy of the same pain you underwent, to him or her….

Hold on! Listen to what a plastic bag has to say...

Hello everyone!yes!!! this is a plastic bag here! a member of the family- PLASTICS.

 I am glad that I got this space to spit out whatever is there on my mind.

Okay,You know me very well. I am a part and parcel of your life.technically speaking I am a long chain of carbons molecules called polymers.

whatever, MAN is my god for he is our creator

I am around you, and the cars you drive, the computers you use, the utensils you cook with, the recreational equipment you play with, and the houses and buildings you live and work in all include plastics. You buy food and water wrapped in plastics and you throw wastes wrapped preciously in plastics tooJ

There are many others stronger than us  in our family.. We don’t rust, we are cheap….

But there is some problem which is upsetting us and I know,even all the members of my family……..PLEASE LISTEN TO WHAT I HAVE TO SAY

We understood that we cause pollution…hey listen friends this is not at all intended..

Each day I see people going on a rally saying “goodbye plastics” and all that. we really get insulted or more than that,painL

When I was born,all I saw around me was millions of bags like me and other stronger members of our family.i thought that was the world.but when I got out of that factory I saw the REAL BEAUTIFUL world……

Omg!what a cute wonderful world you have  man! amazing! green all around. your god is a great artist…

Only he can create this world which is perfect to the core…

But my creator I mean “the man” make haste, never think of the consequences of whatever he does…

I feel making us, plastics, is a mistake in many ways…But I think even your god make mistakes otherwise he wouldn’t have created you….oops sorry…just my rage out of pain.

ATLEAST you rot when you are dead

alas! we aren’t even capable of thatL (and as far as I am concerned that’s the only difference between us)

 Well no worries we are ready to quit or we would love to emancipate the world from us

But why don’t you realize that only our creator can destroy us? That means only you can do it

So why don’t you simply gradually avoid us rather than simply bark.

So just don’t blame us okay???? What can we do????

See, after seeing your mother nature , i myself and my family felt real bad. We never wanted to be one of the reasons why your earth suffers….

And if an outsider like me is feeling so ,I wonder why you people are least bothered about the place you live in!!! shame on your part…

So its not too late.hey man ,wake up time! we beg you.”reduce,reuse,recycle” us and finally KILL.why is the delay???we don’t care if our race face extinction….

Hoping for something positive,

YOUR’S LOVINGLY,

 A PLASTIC BAG.

“The nature of your future depends upon the future of the nature”

                                                 -ANON-

To my stranger

It’s a cold night and I stay awake

Thinking of you my stranger

We never met and we never shall

And still you  follow me…

Among every crowd I walk through,

Behind every blue roses I see,

Within the protective aura I feel

I know you  are there invisible ,staring at me ,smiling at me,trying to perfect me.

 You hide inside the soul of everyone I meet,

The reason why everyone has a common trait…

And every time I thought I found you, I never did

It was only your shadow in the dark.

 Its stupid of me I know

Because I try to believe lies when I know the truth

That we never met and we never shall…

But I feel you know the real me better than anybody else

 my silence didn’t hurt you ,my anger didn’t hurt you

because you and you alone figured out that,

 they were only born from my pain, my sorrow….

but my stranger I aint gonna find you

this fire of fear is swallowing me

and its time to turn out into mere ashes…

and do hear my heart screaming ”we never met we never shall…

that’s the way it is.”

Its a crazy world!

One day somebody smiles at you and the very next day gone is the smile.


You show your sincerity to the core in the work you do, but all you earn is accuses!

You help a person with a true heart and they finally turn out as your enemies.

You love your friends more than your life only to realize one fine day that they were fake!

Oh my god!what a kind of a world is this? Where, everything is so very unpredictable?

Crazy!

we are all inside a tunnel I understand.

how many of you are enjoying the darkness? And how many of you really are dying to see the light?? And worst of all how many of you are pretending as though you are living in light?

Well well,”honesty is the best policy” goes the saying.may be it’s the best but believe me there is nothing to do with the so called “honesty” in this era.

Ya I know exactly what you are thinking now. “cheating, crookedness may all give you a temporary gain but is not gonna help you in the long run”

Well let me ask you,what do you mean by the “long run”?

Any way nobody is gonna stay here forever or is gonna get out alive!

See experience Is the best teacher and what if experiences teaching you that in today’s world all you need is money and money rules the world? will you learn that lesson or?

Its confusing isn’t it?

BUT I wanna tell you this, eventhough its like that its you who is gonna decide about you and your life.so even if the whole world is against you, do anything which you think is just because good always win in the battle vs evil

To make it more clear listen to this,

Life is a running race and you are one among the participants

Some fools take the shortcut because they wanna reach the destination fast but they fail to understand that on doing so the game they play doesn’t become fair

It becomes a foul play.spectators and co participants and all may fail to notice that but

Somebody is watching you from the heaven friends, and nothing can cheat those eyes.:)

lotus of peace blooms in santhigiri ashram...

• The 21 petal lotus of peace,With a blooming spirituality, in Santhigiri Ashramam in
  Thiruvanathapuram(kerala,India) was  dedicated to the entire world on 12^th Sept 2010,on  the occasion of the 84th birthday of Navajyothisree Karunakara Guru. The day is other wise known as the “the Day of Light”.

The Parnasala is considered as the respect of the devotees of Navajyothisree Karunakara Guru, founder of the Ashramam. The Significance of Parnasala flows from Navajyothisree Karunakara Guru’s Life and Realization for the world. The lotus structure which consists of 21 petals – 12 unfurling in the top layer and 9 towards the base.

This huge structure is an architectural spectacle a visual wonder Each petal on the top extends to 41 feet height while the bottom petals are 31 feet long, exhibiting an exceptional architectural skill not seen in contemporary buildings The structure, standing 91 feet tall and 84 feet wide, is the largest of its kind in the world. The monument, in the shape of a lotus in full bloom, has been constructed using the best quality ‘Makrana’ Marble in the world. The Guru’s body is laid to rest in the sanctum of the Parnasala which is shaped like a lotus bud carved out of wood. The entire interior of 27 feet height and 21 feet diameter is encased with brass. In front of the sanctum (Sarakoodam) is a carved wooden mandapam (platform) called the Balalayam. The Balalayam is guarded by two majestic tuskers carved in rosewood..

The Original Parnasala was built up by Guru in 1960’s with a thatched hut, reflecting the inherent simplicity and austerity. Guru stayed in this simple structure, consisting of a thatched roof supported by four poles, and interacted with the visitors coming to see Him. It was here that Guru attained spiritual completion in 1973. Thousands were initiated to the spiritual path at its doorstep. Later, the thatched hut was converted into a one-room tenement with a tiled roof. After the Guru’s merger with the Adi Sankalpam (the Plane of Primordial Consciousness) on 6th May, 1999, at the age of 72. His body was placed inside a marble casket and kept in the sanctum sanctorum of the Parnasala, which has now been raised as a magnificent building, in keeping with its Divine significance.

(original parnasala)

Navajyothi Sree Karunakara Guru was born on 1927 in Chandiroor, Alleppey district, Kerala. His teachings followed the theme of a global spiritual and cultural renaissance in harmony with material progress. He focused on the aspect of the soul that carries karmic merits and impurities that result in success or failure in life. Through relentless efforts, great sacrifices, strong conviction and endless perseverance, Guru completed the mission of establishing the Yuga Dharma for this Age (Kali Yuga Dharma). Hundreds of thousands of devotees from different parts of the world, irrespective of class, caste, creed, colour or culture, have accepted the path of Karma and Dharma revealed by the Guru.

The Santhigiri Ashram is a movement embracing all human actions, spiritual, material and cultural, setting up the standards for everything in the light of universal love and grace of God. Navajyothisree Karunakara Guru, the Founder Acharya has taken into consideration the human prospects in all its relevance and potentiality for shaping the future of the world strictly in accordance with the grace and Will of God for which strict adherence to Yuga Dharma is one among the important pre-requisites. The main activities of the Ashramam includes Annadhanam which is one of Sri Karunakara Guru’s objectives was to feed the poor and to this effect the ashram offers an Annadhanam or gifting of food, at their various centers, to people from the lower economic strata. Athurasevanam or care of the ailing is another activity that is a supporting function to the Guru’s vision. The ashram performs this function through a chain of Ayurvedic research centers, hospitals, onsite and offsite health care programs and camps and social research. Another activity is the Athmabodhanam or spiritual awakening. The awakening is at two levels – rational and transcendental; the former focuses on elimination of ignorance while the latter focuses on knowledge of reality. Another is Economic development which as a part of the vision of a revitalized life, the ashram focuses and with an emphasis on trade skills and support for women and cottage industry programs.

A holistic healthcare doctrine propounded by Guru (Nava Arogya Dharma Siddhantham) has resulted in the revival of the traditional Indians systems of medicine — Ayurveda and Siddha. The Healthcare Division runs a chain of treatment centers and hospitals across India and overseas, besides medical colleges, a research centre for Ayurveda and Siddha and a modern Ayurveda and Siddha medicine manufacturing plant.

The main Ashram at Pothencode is spread over 100 acres, comprising a ‘Prarthanalayam’ (Prayer Hall), Parnasala (Guru’s Abode), Sahakarana Mandiram (Shrine of Togetherness), kitchen, dining hall, work centers and accommodation facilities for more than 1500 inmates.

Today, as predicted by Guru, His guidance continues to emanate through His foremost disciple, Shishyapoojitha Janani Amritha Jnana Thapaswini, to anyone who seeks it. The guidance of Guru acts as a corrective force, removing the inherent ‘karmic’ and other infirmities in an individual ‘jeeva’ (soul, life-force), aiding its journey to the ultimate destination – the Supreme.Guru had assured the ‘parampara’ that a spiritually enlightened soul will always guide it as the ‘Gurusthaneeya’ (Guru Apparent).Guru is manifesting his will and guidance through the Shishyapoojitha. The Prayer Hall is the most sacred place at Santhigiri Ashram where devotees can pray and chant the ‘Akhanda Namam’ round the clock. The timings of worship (aradhana) correspond to eight ‘yamasandhi’ (turns of day). These are: 3 a.m., 6 a.m. (varies according to sunrise), 9 a.m., noon, 3 p.m., 6 p.m. (varies according to sunset), 9 p.m., and midnight. There are two additional prayers at 5 a.m. and 5 p.m.

dear friends,

this post is something about the truth that the entire humankind shall unwrap soon…

it is the light of this truth that is going to wipe away the darkness of ignorance of this world …

may be you are not able to follow this completely but I am sure something will strike your mind, at least  someone,s mind….

ANYBODY can visit the sacred place  and understand what it is all about…please keep in mind that this is not about one of  the various temples or swamis or saints that we see around…this is unique

http://video.aol.ca/video-detail/lotus-shaped-parnasala-at-santhigiri-ashram/4038540482
how to reach ashram:-
    Santhigiri Ashram is situated on a beautiful hillock, 24 Kms. away from Trivandrum city, capital of Kerala, South India. Government buses and private taxies are available to reach Ashram.

    The address is Santhigiri Ashram,

P.O. Koliakode,

Via. Venjarammod (Pothenkode),

Trivandrum- 695607, Kerala, India.

Tel No. +91 471 419313 or 419056

Fax No.+91 471 419076,

e-mail : mailto:carlosguzman@santhigiri.com?subject=Santhigiri%20Ashram's%20Feedback...

(thanks to google,rarurv.blogspot.com,trivandrumbuzz.com)

Reading just a hobby???

The word hobby would be too small a word to describe such a great art-reading!

 The word would suit the art of reading in many contexts but there are a few exceptions.

Reading is not only about time pass or a mode of seeking knowledge but a great relief, a short escapism from the reality! According to me at the least

Yep! Particularly when the world around you, irritates you.

Just think of this, the crowd around you is screaming at you. screaming in the sense…like,
perhaps they want your attention but you don’t seem to like that.
perhaps they want to tell you that you should be with them and your path is wrong, but actually you are not interested for you don’t want to be with them and you know your path is right.

you are literally exhausting and dying because of that bedlam of yells .you are not able to take it anymore, the anger is gradually waking up for they have irritated u enough and the good mood of you is going to sleep for you are captivated.

So friends before your provoked mind commands anything to you or if you are wondering about what could be done at such an instance, think,

What other idea than opening a book and slipping away to another world can be the ultimate retaliation and the ultimate escape? Brilliant isn’t it???

The idea that satisfies both anger and sadness.



Now, It’s a kinda “bunking off” so don’t take anything with you but just grab the hands of ‘concentration’ with you.

As you run way, you can hear those sick people still irritating you but their voices are fading now for you are far away from them, now please show your victorious grin

And far away they continue to provoke you because you are physically present but you know you are mentally vanished!



Writers are great,blessed specially by the god, mortal gods as I would like to call them for they create fantasy worlds with mere pens, a world invisible yet beautiful when our Imagination ignites life in those worlds!

Books are nothing but mobile worlds,each different from another,and you have great choices...aint it a boon for a  refugee???
So now when you reach another world you start the journey, where you are invisible to the people in those worlds! you watch them,dream about what you would have done

if you were in that ,altogether u enjoy it.Those people make you laugh, cry……. Ya kind of roller coaster drive through emotions

And as the end nears a tear trickles down your cheeks (I do get them !), you think “alas its all over, a beautiful world wish I could stay longer……. ,forever”

but impossible!(wait, but they say nothing is impossible right??? I doubt it now!)

Well you wouldn’t have felt so if you consider reading as just a hobby. hope I made my part clear

And if any book bores you,don’t worry here alone, refugees always have multiple choices as I told you………

Provided that it doesn’t take long to reach there

And the situation becomes pathetic, when you want to go to another world but the distance is too long or time is very less,or you are midway through!

At last its time to wake up and stop this ‘journey’…

now walk back slowly to the reality.

you can smile now for there would be peace because either the crowd must have died literally or they might have calmed down ,

if not, come on take another journey!



So cannot imagine a world with out books no?

Well but one thing, like books to some to some , arts, music and color may be for others…..

But all I want to say is that I hate the idea of calling reading as mere hobby…….. it is the best gift god has given us, a boon and much more…….

THIS EVENING IS LEAVING ME MELANCHOLIC!

Sitting near the window enjoying the rhythm of the rain and watching the droplets tickling everything it touches, it’s a kind of cooling effect to eyes and mind and something more
i find varying reactions or emotions towards a sudden shower
Here I can see fallen faces of many kids. The intrusion of the rain
had stopped their interesting game.
Also people are running towards their terrace to save their clothes from attack of the rain. and some here are cursing the rain so bad of them cuz they do the same even if it were sunny.
( crazy people!
why don’t you stick to one thing????).And some are enjoying a cup of hot drink ,watching the rain. Most of them are happy and enjoying the poor clouds weeping! I still am trying to find out their pain, the reasons for their tears. bet they are not intenser than mine!
And some people like me feel very melancholic at this weather.seriously I dont know why I had fallen in love with that word ever since I knew it
Its like that word is made only for me. may be sounding a little odd but truth is stranger than fiction!
Melancholic because hmm…. let me try to make you understand how I feel during some special rainy days (and this evening is one such)
I personally find a rainy evening is a very very apt time to miss somebody. That too not a close friend but somebody you don’t even know! yep,like a stranger you saw in train, peering eyes in a crowd,a smiling face that made you think “who was that?”,somebody who was wandering in the streets with an air of mystery and so on
And its also a good time to open up my casket of worries. actually even if we don’t wanna open it, before anything could be done we shall be hypnotized by the power of the rain and it shall leave us inactive to protest. we cant do it as easily as we argue with our mom!
But that’s nice. its then we understand it is not the gravitational pull of the earth which is giving us our weight ,but its the loads and loads of worries within us that is the reason for that!
Believe me we can float when it’s like raining directly towards our heart washing away all the worries!
Fine fine…..i know what you are thinking
This is beyond the limit of being fictious! but you know what?please blame it on your poor imagining capacity.yep I am rude!
But not very rude, read this: actually its like, when emotions are at the brim of my heart, mixture of emotions to be precise, then that gives me a sort of foggy language……..
So where did I stop,oh ya, its like rain washing away all our worries …….
I wish if those tears could wipe off even all the ignorance and darkness of all of us
Let me give you a new born –somewhat a poem

“they kill, the destroy, out of anger out of looniness,
They escape, they hide
Out of reach,out of sight
The die,they cry
Ignorant people,Innocent people
Oh rain they say earth is blue
But we doubt it
because its blood red, everywhere
We are sick,
could you wipe away these stains
and gift us a new colorful tomorrow?……… “

yeah…….. somewhat a poem indeed, okay for a rough work I believe.
well now let me go back to my childhood…you know when I was young I used to stand in different poses when there was lightning and rain
wanna know the reason?????
I thought that lightning was nothing but the flash light of a camera, the camera of none other than god sitting up above and thought he wanted a few snaps of mine!!!!!
Ha ha funny…


Well you know I am always grateful to rain for taking me back to my childhood days. That’s really lovely…….
But Oh no……… it stopped raining  NOT FAIR! ha! naughty sun has come out with a grin……

So looks like raining of words too have stopped and its time for me to bid farewell. Hope it wasn’t boring?

A POEM...

"The road is long

i am a lonely song

oh breeze, take me far...

to the farthest star"

WHY DID THE LONELY TEAR CRY?

She was like the leaf that refused to dance with her pals with the rhythm of the wind
While others admired the beauty of the rose, it was the thorns, which caught her attention.
Nobody knew that.
I like to call her “the lonely tear”
Her journey started like any other one, with a flock…
She wanted to talk with them but nobody bothered to listen.
She wanted to oppose the wrong, but courage betrayed her .
she got irritated.
But her heart said that all was goanna be fine but mind asked her to change the track
Then she stopped, others went away…..nobody noticed that she was missing
Now She was alone and confused. confused because there arose a dilemma
“Was it her heart’s words that all she needs or was it the minds words that she should heed.
In the battle mind won.
she started building her own world, and she got hypnotized by the solitude that her world offered
Days died one by one and soon she got used to the eerie world. Eerie, only to others. As she walked on, she could hear somebody shouting her to come back
However, she pretended to be deaf. Because by then her world amazed her and she wanted to move on!

One day the lonely tear cried……..cried and cried.
It was so odd that she did that
She should not have, for she loved the numbness of loneliness, it was a soothing pain.
She never regretted because she chose what she liked
Then why did the lonely tear cry?
Was she sad that her world only had
a diary, a pen,music,books nature and silence? No that was rich enough.
then why?
It all happened because of expectations…….
when she forgot how to smile, when she was at the threshold of something weird ,her heart dominated her mind, gifted her hopes.
Hopes which at last turned out to be some bloody broken expectations.it hurt her.
She now understands,”expectation” is a poison .
She now wants to get out of the inferno….
But she don’t want to go back, she is only wondering if she could ever get somebody to understand her to share her world
But whom she wants is just another her, another lonely tear. she is sick of pretending now
I understand, with confusions screaming around her, she is trying to talk but unfortunately, her language is silence....
Or is she a coward?

i love my ink pen!!

You know something? Like you all, I too have many things, big and small those are close to my heart
And one among them is my pretty ink pen
She is not just pretty but really intelligent too!!!
May be its sounding a bit weird but still that’s the truth
Whenever I try to convert my thought to words I think its actually the magic of my ink pen that polishes those words up to my contentment. I truly feel that!
I bet you won’t believe that..
She gives me happiness and adds colour to the serenity of my silent world..
I hardly notice time flying when I write with my fountain pen
Everyday I use my pen so long that, the moment it becomes difficult for her to breathe she sings
“oh dear master
Fill my tummy with ink
Like how your sister
Fill your heart with love”
So you can guess I have bottles and bottles of ink with me

I don’t think in this era there are many people who use fountain pen (or pen itself!) for them I feel pity because they are missing something sweet.
Papers with a couple of ink spills, hands with few ink blots are all truly lovely and today very rare….really sad:-(

ITS TWILIGHT MANIA!!

Hi dudes!!it has been a very long time since i updated my blog....
its really frustrating because my internet connection is not proper yet.
but hopes never die....
so let me take this once in a month or whatever oppurtunity to write something about my favourite book TWILIGHT...
oh my god its really a wonderful book i have ever read!really fantabulous!
whatever your mood be just before reading the book, i can assure you that once you start reading the stuff you will be automatically shifted to a fantasy world.
Not scary like dracula,little dissappointed about that alone!
though the fear element comes at the last i really loved the book.
i wanna read the second part "new moon"
i dont wanna see the flick of twilight bcoz my friends say its not that much interesting,like u wont get the same pleasure you get while reading the book.
A vampire love story as you all know but more than that what i liked was different habits of vampires,their characteristics,immortal life, how
the hero's father (not own father) his siblings,he himself changed to vampires.
After reading the book i wish i were a vampire too!

THE SWEET POISON........

I, a candle and friendship,the flame.
oh friends you kill me...
I, a dewdrop and friendship the sun beams
oh friends you kill me...
you blue roses bloomed in me,
we laughed ,we cried and
within a wink did time pass..

like how folks walk on shores,leaving those soft prints..
those days extinguished leaving the cute memories in my heart...
waves may wash away the prints,
but time is too ignorant a fool....
never escape through my dreams and never escape through my breath...

i admit, friendship the real kiler....
and now i too drink the sweet poison and commit a slow suicide....

OUR FAREWELL PARTY.........(2009-2010)

ITS HEART BREAKING BECAUSE A BEAUTIFUL CHAPTER OF OUR LIFE IS GONNA END. TILL TODAY WE WERE ALL TOGETHER BUT TOMORROW .....

WITH HOPES OF BEING REUNITED AGAIN ,I CONCLUDE WITH TEARS AS WELL AS SMILE.

GOOD BYE DUDES

I WILL MISS YOU.................

"OH PALS,GOOD OLD MEMORIES WILL BE FRESH FOREVER

I PROMISE,EVEN IF I DISSOLVE WITH THIS EARTH,

EVEN IF MY SOUL DIE."

tear drops on my paper.....

life still goes on...
but i never lived a single second...
maybe i am acting,
acting as living

i never discovered the real me..
because my dreams never had wings..

i talk with them,i laugh with them..
they think i am a funny gal
but they never know i am a disguise...

they think i am crazy
but i am really mad....
they think i am happy
but i am really sad.....
mad and sad because i live in my own world of thoughts..

i never won a single fight ,
they feel i cant do it
but, they never knew i was learning
learning for a large battle

i feel lonely when they are around me
i feel like running away...

and i know at last
when i die,they come and sob
but i alone know,
that it was not me who really died.......
and now you too know.....
then i regret ,then i confess....
alas, teardrops on my paper!!!